Let’s talk about chastity for submissives.
Being in chastity means you don’t get to have sex. Often it means you’re forbidden from touching yourself or getting to cum.
The historical roots of chastity are in religion. Denying yourself sexually for a power greater than yourself has been popular since before the birth of Christ, and has spilt in to almost every major religion on earth.
Of course, as a dominant this link to the divine has not been lost on me.
There’s a good reason to deny those who are beneath you orgasms. The powerlessness and devotion that come from avoiding cumming for long periods of time leads to all kinds of emotions.
The right combination of denial and stimulation can be absolutely religious, even for you Godless heathens.
For some of you, you’re not going to need convincing to fall down this particular rabbit hole. I know plenty of my readers are tightly locked in their long term chastity cages, and some of those are lucky enough to be under my supervision and guidance.
The experience of chastity is different for everyone, and denial produces different results in different people. Feelings of frustration, powerlessness and a lack of control are common.
But for those who can control themselves and fall into the experience, it’s a rewarding journey.
What are the different types of chastity?
Physically, there are two main methods.
The first involves an honour system, where both submissive and dominant agree that the submissive is in chastity. They’re not allowed to cum until they’re released, which could be a fixed point or it could be left in the hands of the dominant.
The second involves a physical device, such as a chastity cage, to prevent subs from cumming or touching themselves. There are lots of styles and types available for men, and the size of your manhood is going to influence the type of chastity cage you’re able to wear.
It’s worth noting that many men who have gone into long term caged chastity have reported shrinking to their penis size. Scary, maybe, but I find it an absolute turn on to think I’m changing someone’s manhood the longer they’re in denial for me.
What are some of the benefits of putting a submissive in chastity?
Oh, there are so many.
The benefits for a dominant include an amazing sense of control. When a submissive or slave is locked in his cage, the feeling of having a physical claim on his body as well as his mind is intoxicating.
This feeling is only surpassed by how the sub’s behaviour changes. They become so much more focused on the pleasure of their dominant, their desire to serve deepens, their feelings of attachment to you grow.
There are benefits to the submissive too. Being controlled in this way can give a submissive feeling that stays present constantly. At first, you’ll most likely be very focused on what’s being denied.
Sexual thoughts will be constantly present to begin with and you’re likely to crave your domme’s attention and approval. Longer term chastity can be a great opportunity to focus on your goals inside your relationship, or externally.
This is because your desire for sex will most likely lessen. It’s difficult to constantly crave something you know you’re not going to have.
You can channel the experience to be more productive at work, meet health goals or be a better and more slutty submissive.
Goals should be discussed and negotiated with your domme beforehand, and that’s absolutely part of the fun.
Do You Need A Dominant To Experiment With Chastity?
Nope.
Denying yourself sex and orgasms for a fixed period of time, or indefinitely, can be done solo for any number of reasons.
What Are Some Things To Remember When A Sub Is In Chastity?
If you are playing with a chastity cage, there are some medical angles to be aware of. Restricting blood flow in the body is dangerous, your body need blood flow or bad things happen.
Cages can rub, injure your delicate genitals or cause infections.
There’s a great guide to chastity cage safety at Bed Bible but the short version is this: make sure your cage fits you comfortably. Make sure you clean your cage. If your balls or penis start changing colour, hurting, or tingling then stop using the device immediately.
A sub in chastity might become more needy and require more attention than usual. Make sure you’re both aware of the impact that might have.
Limits and boundaries should be spoken about too. If there is a lot of trust between you, the limits will likely look different than if you’ve only just started to play together.
The circumstances that a chastity session should end should also be discussed. Sometimes it’s when the sub wants it to, at other times the domme might be given some leeway to push her toy.
Many chastity devices come with keys, and it’s a common ritual for the domme to hold the keys, and be the one to unlock the cage if it’s to be cleaned, or if it’s play time.
What Are Some Games You Can Play With Subs In Chastity?
Link their success to their chastity
If there’s a goal or task you’ve set, it’s motivating to link a sub’s failure to their chastity sentence. This could be a big goal or a small one. Their focus may not be as good as it normally is, which can be interesting extra cruelty.
Play games
Similar to the above, but more lighthearted. If you enjoy chaos, link an extra day in chastity to a dice roll or a coin flip.
Tease
Being in chastity is such a tense, sexually sensitive state. Sending nudes, sexual messages, or physically teasing a sub’s body will land differently when they know they aren’t getting any orgasms.
Let them express themselves
Either encourage them to communicate with you or record their feelings in a journal. It’ll give you some idea of how they’re feeling and where you might be able to push them harder.
Exposure
Being in chastity can feel humiliating.
If so, it’s an interesting game to bring other’s in on the secret, or at least threaten to. Maybe there’s an open minded friend who might be interested in what you did to your sub, or you could act like you might tell people who he wouldn’t want to know.
Well, there you have it, that’s chastity 101.
If you’re in chastity right now, you’re invited to share any benefits you’ve had in the comments section so others can learn from you.